#Empowered

When I think of the word "empowered" I certainly don't think of me.  I have never been one to feel like I was "in control" of anything.  To be quite honest, I don't like to be "in control" (specifically in a leadership role.)  I have always been more of a follower.  I can do what needs to be done.  All you need to do is tell me what to do and I will do my very best to do what your expectation is.  I am an ELL Ed Tech III at at elementary school.  ELL means English Language Learners.  This is my third year in the building and I absolutely LOVE my job.  I LOVE the kids I work with every day.  My school has a 39% ELL population, mostly Somali.  I LOVE those kids.  I would like to believe that they have helped me to feel empowered at times.  When I was hired I told the director that I had NO ELL experience.   She said that she felt I would be fine.  She was right.  Those kids bring out the best in me, they empower me to be a better teacher, person, wife, friend, etc.

Since coming to know Christ the word "empower" means so much more to me.  It doesn't necessarily mean a "leader."  To me, it means because I have put my faith and trust in Jesus Christ, I can be empowered each and every day to do whatever it is that I need to do.  Some days are better than others.  Many times I have to ask for His help, dust myself off and start all over again.

When I think about my food battles I have to believe I will overcome my emotions and empower myself to not give in to silly temptations.  I have to NOT let my emotions win.  I am the type of person that will turn to junk food (candy in particular) for ANY reason.  I can be happy, anxious, mad, stressed, sad, etc.  I don't need a reason.  I have to believe that Jesus will EMPOWER me to rise above all the noise in my head and not cave in to the craving.

I joined Weight Watchers around 13 years ago.  My husband joined with me.  We lost over 100 pounds together in about a year.  He lost his weight in about six months, me in about eleven months.  A few years ago I had some bumps in my weight loss journey and gained about 12-15 of my 31 lost pounds back.  I joined myfitnesspal.com and tracked my calories.  I was able to lose about twenty pounds in about a year.  I have continued to be pretty successful since then, about two years ago.  I don't track anything now.  I joined this study though because I know I am walking the wire again.  I am going to 40 on July 1st and I want to be at a certain goal weight.  I have about eight pounds to go.  I believe this study will help me to continue to be empowered but also keep me accountable.  I started going to regular Zumba classes about six months ago, I do a Bokwa class once a week.  I exercise in a group class three days a week.  I love it.  I love the class, the people, the empowerment.  I feel empowered when I leave class.

I know I will stumble and fall on this latest journey but I ask all of you to pray for me.  I never had a weight issue as a child/teen.  I started gaining weight after I got married.  I got lazy.  I had never had to exercise or watch what I ate before.  I lost my 31 pounds on Weight Watchers without doing a lick of exercise.  That wasn't necessarily a good thing for me.  I had to force myself to think outside of the box and try some new things, hence the Zumba and Bokwa classes.  As each year passes maintaining the lost weight becomes even harder.  I would appreciate all of  your prayers.  I am my own worst enemy.  I ask for specific prayer of not comparing my body with others, with not beating up on myself when I gain a little or when I cave and have a sweet.  I know we are all in this together.  I welcome this new journey and this new empowerment.  Bring it on!